On my way back in the dead of night I pass by a mistimed overtake or an unforeseen skid. Strewn flowers line a trail of broken things and regrets as onlookers gather. At the centre of it all, an old market woman lies spread eagled, her white face mask standing bright against hair matted into the dark wet shine around the back of her head. Unencumbered, her eyes remain fixed at the heavens as if to ask – ‘is there anybody out there?’ Not brave enough to see if she is answered, I check that my helmet is fastened and accelerate home.
Step off that plane and into a wall of sticky heat The thick air enveloping me like in a lucid dream Only carrying bold ambition, no worldy possessions in tow (To thank for that was Aeroflot, who left my bag in Moscow)
If this city can be described in one word well that word is ALIVE It’s inhabitants buzz around like in a busy bee hive Swarms of scooters honking their hooters moving together like schools of fish Yielding right of way is right out of the question You just drive straight in, red lights are but a suggestion
A world of fast tracked friends, a sense of fun without end A place where people are just themselves, there’s no need to pretend Well I’ve already leveled up and am now ready to feed the beast The gloves are coming off in this Wild Wild East
As always – the clock’s ticking, so what’ll I do? Everything I can dammit, and some extra stuff too – I want to take cool photos I want to write some rhymes I want to “find myself”, (for like the seventh time) I want to learn the local customs I want to dine off the street I want to fall a bit in love with every person that I meet I wanna stay up all night waiting for the sun to rise above the clouds (But then end up missing it cause I’m too busy making out) I wanna smoke the local weed and drink ice tea too, I’m trying all the new things, don’t get me started on the food! Pho, bun cha, ban xeo, Rau muong, goi cuon, com chay and cao lau! I want to soak up the city vibes, every day and every kind, As I step outside my front door to breathe in that fresh… uh nevermind
I’m here to remind myself that destiny can be mine It’s choose your own adventure, and my choice is adventure every time I want to share my energy and get high on connection With someone who gets me, and understands my direction I’m gonna flirt with Jupiter and ask the moon to dance I’ll stare right into the eye of that great thing we call… coincidence I’m striving for that experience most potent – Of being completely at peace with the present moment
I’m not thinking about my life plan, and the things I’m supposed to do I’m not worried about my pension or even my next solid poo I’m fucking here, now, to feel! And what I feel is joy Well shit son, looks like you made it… welcome to Hanoi.
Often would I sit, in a despairing pit Of my own creation which – chained my spirit to the floor To escape this mire, I knew I would require Underneath me a fire – just to get me out the door
See – to live a life sedentary, can depress the soul aplenty It affects the landed gentry – as it does the poor But then I read the news, that with just a pair of shoes You can break out of those blues – if you try to run some more
The thought it made me queasy, that it could be so easy A disposition made breezy with a jog and nothing more?! I decided I would try it, though I didn’t fully buy it, But to keep my demons quiet – it was worth a shot for sure
So with my trainers laced, and my running songs placed in a list, I then faced – my fears and went to war, Slowly did I first move, as I got into the groove And let the rhythm of the tunes – choose the pace I hit the floor
Soon I was pushing through the pavement, every step I made a statement of this newfound elatement, hot damn – what a score! I could feel my mindset morphin’, as I came up on endorphins And without shame or sin?! I should really run some more
With growing confidence came quickened haste By Odin’s Raven this is great! Why was I told not of this before? Though I began to feel some pain, as my body it did strain, Against this relentless train – of might and magic most pure
But no time for doubt or rest, ignore that drumming in your chest, I’ll beat my personal best – if I can press on and endure, Then my joints they did rattle as I began to battle With my mind’s inner-prattle – “slow down!”, it said (what a bore)
Nothing can stop me now, just when I’ve figured how To plough my energy with such force, Imagine then my sense of wonder, when I felt a crack of thunder My body torn asunder – by the gods of excess and more
I started then to feel, in truth… ethereal, The smoke cleared to reveal what held me back – strewn on the floor wasting no goodbyes, I took it in my stride, and cast that mortal coil aside – my spirit free To run some more
Meow meow meow (how do you do) isn’t it great to be a cat? I’ve a long swishy tail and sleek black fur I do a Rolls Royce purr who doesn’t love that?
dogs I have no time for, heavens above! with their boundless enthusiasm and unconditional love it’s a well known fact – the beasts have no tact and while to them you might be Master to me darling, you’re staff
you rescued me from obscurity and a life of boredom on dreary streets you enjoy spoiling me, I love it myself it makes my whiskers wiggle now let me knock every thing off your shelf …just for shits and giggles
ah I see you’re home purr purr purr please feed me right meow you obsequious cur ah… you got me a cat thing… that was expensive I’ll bet not to be unkind but you won’t mind if I play with the cardboard box instead? where are my manners, I do say I have a gift for you too – it’s in the litter tray
very well, I’ll humour you Human you may give my belly a rub but do it for more than just three seconds and I will fuck your shit up
it’s 5am, meow wake up! I need to go outside well thank you dear for opening the door… but now I see it’s raining I think I’ve changed my mind
I’m there when you’re happy I’m there when you’re sad I’m there on your darkest nights I’ll purr on your chest to try help you rest when you’re high as a fucking kite
I’ll intertwine our spirits as I rub ‘round your legs the very Shadow of your soul in flux there are those who would surely beg for their own little living Horcrux
so when you fuck off
without so much as a farewell I’ll leave my mark and haunt your heart (you can be sure of that) but do you think I’ll care, or even tell? bitch please
tell me about the worst day of your life tell me what do you like to create in the dead of night tell me about your favourite book and why it’s movie was shite you can tell me things I already know I’m curious to hear your side now tell me something that might surprise me you callipygous delight
sure – what’s between your legs is interesting dear but right now I’d rather caress what’s between your ears I wanna hear you say things you never thought of before and ask you questions that make you wanna ask more and if it happens that I step too far then tell me instead why we shouldn’t go to Mars
I wanna know what you think happens when we die and in return I’ll share with you the last time that I cried bones points if you ask me something that makes me stop and think (hey while I’m musing on that answer would you like another drink?)
I wanna stay up until the crack of noon talking about how Firefly ended too soon tell me about that time that you lost a bet tell me what are the drugs that you haven’t tried… yet “I wanna know if this feeling flows both ways” I wanna grow, and have you point out my mistakes
call me out on my bullshit! I fucking love it when I’m wrong tell me that actually that band didn’t write that song school me hard when your heart is in it then stare into my eyes for four entire minutes and when all of that is said and done… I wanna know what makes you come
I DON’T want to know “what’s up” when it comes to that I don’t give a fuck
don’t text me what you’re doin’ just to get my attention don’t ask about my plans tonight (unless you can suggest a correction) I don’t want a notation of your day-to-day life that’s one of many reasons I’m not looking for a wife I love that you’re interested, it really is a plus but if you haven’t got a point it comes across as vacuous
if you receive a witty remark or a thoughtful flirt don’t reply with one word – Christ make a feckin’ effort I don’t want it to seem as though I’m asking for too much but R.I.P my esteem of you if you just send me a thumbs up
now I know you’re thinkin’ – “Darragh, who are YOU to complain?” “your high and mighty rant reeks of supercilious distain” well at least when I spew bullshit I try to entertain and it’s not a lot to ask for conversations of quality cause boring small talk and vapid chit chat just feed my apathy
So I suppose my point is (in case I forgot to mention) really tell me anything but PLEASE do it with intention
I was in Barcelona to visit my sister and decided to sign up for the weekly Poetry & Storytelling open mic that runs Thursdays in Pub Limerick. Much like the one I regularly take part in back in Madrid, the standard was high and the people were lovely and incredibly talented. I was given a ten minute slot at the end and picked out three pieces that I thought would go down well, the crowd seemed to enjoy it and I had an absolute blast. The fact that I was just a little wired at the time only added to the experience.
A special shoutout to Wally for capturing it all on video.
“Ramblings of a Savoir Fairy” was the first poem I wrote for the stage and I actually came up with entire thing the last time I was in Barcelona back in October. It’s still my favourite piece so it was nice to bring it full circle and share it with the city that inspired it.
Whenever I perform “Squirrels!” I have to make sure I stay extra focused on whoever I’m talking to afterwards. The poem really highlights my short attention-span and I imagine they’re expecting my mind to wander!
You would not believe the amount of people that have come up to me to take my and scream “YES!” after seeing me perform this at gigs.
Afterwards Maureen, the super host and organiser of the event, asked would I be interested in joining the line up for a bigger night of established poets the following month (when sadly, I wouldn’t be around) and another one of the performers, Zaq Squares, invited me to take part at a concert that he was running the following week – which I would still be in town for!
These were honestly the nicest compliments I’ve received for my poetry yet and something I would never have expected. At his gig Zaq played a mixture of fun covers and his own superbly written songs and I can’t remember the last time I saw someone that good play in a bar. He’s on Spotify and is well worth checking out, and his charming short story about an inchworm that he read out at the poetry night is a pretty funny one too.
At Zaq’s show I was the half-time act. Initially I wasn’t sure how my poems would go down in a busy bar with people who were there for music and the craic, but they really got into it, and I daresay I had their rapt attention throughout. Having lots of them come up to me after to say how much they enjoyed it and what their favourite parts were was quite humbling, and of course we all stuck around for a few beers. Myself and a new Australian friend then ended up having a lock-in with the barman late into the night, don’t ever let it be said that you won’t meet interesting people with poetry! I really couldn’t have asked for a better way to spend my last night in town.
Yes, that is a Danny Dorito on my t-shirt.
As with the Open Mic night, I’m very grateful for the chance to have done it. It was a ton of fun and the confidence boost I got from the whole experience is helping me define my own style of authentic and unapologetic performance-poetry. The goal now is to work on a brand new set of pieces for when I’m back in May, and Zaq and I are hoping to run another gig together then.
Certainly, Barcelona’s hip poetry scene hasn’t seen the last of me.
why hello little bat flyin’ ‘round the room were you here this entire time? what have you been doin’? did you try to hide from wild eyed lies? was the banal banter too much to bear? were you fried by the intensity of our cries and untouched electricity left hanging in the air? do you feel that you didn’t get your share? were you tucked away up there dreaming of all of the things you would dare do when you would wake? well the party’s over little bat, you’ve arisen far too late and all your frantic flutters and romantic stutters are lost in this hour of wolves
I feel the air ripple little bat as you flit about all sultry and the pitter patter of leathery matter attacking walls and making curtains scatter but you can’t stop here! This isn’t bat country you’re dazed and confused little bat, did you fly too close to the sun? that star can damage you know, it’s not always loads of fun were you blinded by the sight of lights that aren’t quite right and now feel a bit fucked?there are certain things that can’t be unseen, and it sure seems like you’re stuck but! there’s an open window of opportunity little bat, you just have to stop and look
I still hear your squeaky cries little bat, I wonder who were they for? do you think anyone discreetly cries for you anymore? I’m crying for you little bat. I’m crying for us both what will you do with your freedom I’ll never know
I wrote this drunk in Paris in the aftermath of last night When a fling and I said our last goodbye, and had our final fight. For this one though don’t shed any tears, it just wasn’t meant to be, She was a person of unnecessary fears, and I of apathy.
The concept of letting things go was something she hated, it wouldn’t have been a hit, Whereas I was so emotionally constipated, I just couldn’t have given a shit. We also had different interests surely, so I’m thinking it wasn’t a surprise, She liked Charles Dickens and getting up early, I preferred drinking (and sometimes kissing guys).
This trip was well planned though, I was thinking ahead And if there was a theme I would say it was “death” – We went to cemeteries, the catacombs and a show in the Bataclan theatre, But I knew it was a crisis when I started wishing that ISIS would come back and attack so I wouldn’t have to be with her.
After our last awkward hug I found myself a cool pub, figuring what harm then, And on the spot I ordered four shots, and proceeded to chat up the cute barman. Today has been fun – I went for a run, and am determined to make the best of my stay, I’m now locked in my room to write with some rum, and channel my inner Ernest Hemmingway.
I like Paris! It’s a cool city (even if some might complain), While I have to admit, it ain’t no Madrid, There’s certainly worse places to break up with a chick, And have a story arc of triumph over distain.
hyperactive squirrels runnin’ ‘round my brain causing no pain but derailing that train of thought that elusive linearity that’s really a formality demanded by this reality and polite conversation I ought to focus more on what I’m doing and who I’m talking to wait what was I doing and what did they just say to me? the squirrels scatter Think of something quick – I’ll ask a question! Always ask a question to buy yourself some time, for time is cheap when you cram so much into every second, and your words are weapons, to fight back against distractions and negligence and I’m back on track! I’m now present. devoting every bit of my attention to the question by wrestlin’ cognitive control, lettin’ my thoughts come and go, like a meditation pro, and it’s just me and the other person. the only two people in the universe I look into their eyes to let them know I’m there (which is fair, cause I really DO care!) And there’s nowhere I’d rather be. And I blink blinking breaks the eye contact and in that millisecond I wander just slightly, to the feeling of skin healing down yonder that’s what I get for frying bacon naked I wonder did she ever fake it? why do I fall in love with every person that I meet? why bother falling in love when I can fall asleep! is everything that’s in front of me really all there is to see? Am I finally the person that I want to be? I’m now drifting freely through memories and possibilities and scurrying up the bark of a large oak tree and I know I nearly have enough acorns to last me the winter and SQUIRRELS! Ye feckers! Be gone! I will be strong I will stay focused on…on… …ah shite I’ve been away again for far too long how are your powers so potent?! you adorable fluffy-tailed coked-out rodents robbing me of my sincerity Will you not just let me be present?
This repeats in my life, over and over and if you think this is bad… well… that’s me when I’m sober
Recorded at Poetry & Storytelling Barcelona 14/03/19
24/10/18
I am the very model of a fairly wired Irishman, cheeky yet polite, and a bit of a contrarian, I always have a lot to say but rarely seem to finish, even though I speak at a million miles a minute.
Shakespeare said brevity is the soul of wit, Well no offence Bill that’s a load of shit, Give all the details and be sure to take your time, You’ll always get away with if you can make it rhyme.
The key to life and to really being happy is to take things in your stride, even if it’s crappy, Give the world your love, to the girls and the guys (how can ya know if you never really tried?!)
Well-worded flattery will get you everywhere, It’s something that the French call “Savoir Fair”, be eloquent, confident, go overboard with merriment, don’t think about the consequence, just act like you don’t care!
Fake it til you make it, if you have to overstate it, Also use big words, it’s not that complicated! Like “superfluous curses”, they won’t fuckin mind this, If all else fails, just kill ’em all with kindness.
Be creative with your pain, that’s something I have seen, So the upcoming verse I need to make about me, It’s a poem within a poem called “16 things to do with you” But wait before I say it there’s one thing I have to do.
“Kinder eggs, chem-sex, dark obsessions, skinny legs excess, control, star signs, the wild unknown, betrayal, heartbreak forgiveness, mistakes, the moon, vermouth Love hurts, and so does the truth”
Onwards and upwards! If you’re trying to move on, Just take all your feels and pain and stick it a song, or a poem or a story or a painting on your wall, If nothing else works then try a voodoo doll.
Still be a good lover, if you’re treated like an ass, Don’t take it to heart – nice guys come last, That double entendre came way over your heads, Forget about it, just allow it, let me make this point instead.
I believe that you get back what you put out, Keep em laughing, have the craic, and you will never doubt, That your friends are the family that you get to choose, If you haven’t found them yet, what have have ya got to lose? Say hi to a stranger, and straight away you’ll know ‘em And if you’re going through hell, well just keep goin’.
Don’t ever listen to me, Christ that would really scare me, These are just the ramblings of a Savoir Fairy. But we can always be thankful, we don’t even have to try, Think you need proof? YOU. ARE. ALIVE.
I know I talk, far more than I should, But hey whatever it is you do… Do it good.
Ramble The World 